Will Heero Survive THIS?
by Friezaess
Summary: Song parody time! And guess who's singing their rendition of 'I Will Survive'? ^_~


**Will Heero Survive THIS?**

Disclaimer: I own bugger all.

Bugger all: Hello!

See?

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Friezaess: Hey minna ^_^! I'm baaaaaaack! And so are the G-boys!

Heero: Omae o korosu.

Friezaess: Aw Hee-chan, you don't really mean that, do ya?

Heero: Hn.

Duo: I would like to take this opportunity to demonstrate Heero's vocabulary. *pulls down a chart with Omae o Korosu' and Hn' written on it* Anything beyond this is a bonus.

Friezaess: Reeeeeally? :)

Trowa: What exactly are you thinking?

Friezaess: Weeeeell remember that little song paradoy I did with Wufei a while back?

Wufei: *muttering something about injustice and katanas*

*everyone sweatdrops*

Friezaess: Well, I've just decided to do another one! And guess who's gonna be staring in it? *casts a wicked grin at Heero*

Heero: Don't even try it.

Friezaess: Hey Heero, remember the last episode where you were in Wing Zero about to destroy that section of Libra?

Heero: Hn.

Friezaess: And remember *this* bit? *presses play on her tape recorder*

Heero (on the tape): I will I will I will I WILL SURVIVE!! *followed by blasting and booming sounds*

Friezaess: *presses stop* I was thinking that reminds me of a song!

Quatre: This sounds interesting.

Friezaess: Oh, it's more than just interesting, my dear Quatre. It is *presses play* HEERO IN LEATHER!! I present to you, Heero (in leather) performing I Will Survive'!

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*cheesy piano intro*

*Heero appears dressed in tight, black leather pants and halter neck top. If you thought Spandex was bad, you should see THIS! Once again the boys are playing instruments- Trowa on piano, Quatre on saxophone, Wufei on drums and Duo on guitar.*

Heero: *singing*

At first I was afraid, I was petrified!

When that damn freaky Zero System took over my mind

But then I spent so many battles kicking Epyon's arse

And I grew fast- and then ol' Zechs came in last

So now I'm back, from outerspace

I just walked in the Wing Zero with a mad look upon my face

This Zero System's really great, it's become my best mate

Just watch those damn OZ M.S. go down while I slowly go insane

But now, oh no! Watch Libra go!

It's gonna crash into Earth thanks to my long-time foe

Weren't you the one who tried to kill me in Tallgeese?

You think I'd stuff up? You think I would rest in peace?

Oh no not I! I will survive!

Oh, as long as I know how to kill, I know I'll stay alive.

I've got all my guns to fire,

And I've got Zero System on hire

I'll survive, I will survive!

Hey hey...

It took all of Wing-y's strength not to fall apart

Duo: Hee hee, Wing-y'!

Heero: 

But I knew I was gonna win right from the very start

And I grabbed my Buster Rifle and aimed it at Libra's remains

I could've died

But then I blew the thing sky high!

And you see me, in Wing Zero

I won like always, the Perfect Soldier, not to mention hero

So you felt like dropping Libra to cause havoc on Earth

Well now who's laughing, Zechs, you bloody lame-ass masquerading jerk!

Friezaess: Dude, that's *harsh*!!

Heero:

Go on now go, detonate yourself

But something tells me you'll be back again in Endless Waltz'

Aren't you the one who always ends up paired with Trieze?

Oh, my mistake- I meant to say Wufei!

Wufei: Injustice! Damn 5X13'ers!! 

Heero:

Oh, but I! I will survive!

Oh as long as I have Zero System, from you I'll never hide

I've got all my guns ablaze

Zero's gonna be the latest craze

I'll survive, I will survive!

Oh-oh

Go on now go, walk out the door.

Thanks to me defeating you there is no longer any war

Other pilots: Hey! What about us?! :(

Heero:

Well maybe the other characters did something 

The pilots were attacking, while Relena kept on yakking

But now I! I will survive!

I'm the main character here, so you just know I'll stay alive,

I've got ol' Wing on stand-by

I'll make all of OZ cry

And I'll survive, I will survive!

*no longer singing*

I will I will I WILL

Everybody in unison: I WILL SURVIVE!!!

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Friezaess: *presses stop on the tape recorder* Ah, another day, another successful humiliation of a GW character.

Heero: Omae o Korosu, and can someone give me a hand out of these leather pants? They're not coming off O_o

Pilots: *backing away slowly*

Friezaess: Oh, I'll be glad ta help you out there, Heero ^_~

Heero: Hn. On second thoughts, maybe I'll just rub some some vaseline on my legs and hope for the best. But when I'm finished

Friezaess: Yeah yeah, I know- omae o korosu. 

Heero: *grumbles and walks off*

Trowa: well, at least I didn't have to watch Wufei's bum this time round.

Wufei: Don't think I've forgotten that little incident', onna! As soon as I find my katanas, I'll slice you up into confetti! *goes off to find his swords*

Friezaess: *brings katanas out from behind her back* Heh heh. He'll be busy for a while ^.^

Duo: My, you are evil!

Friezaess: Yeah, I know! ^_^

Quatre: All right, can we please wrap this up? Sailor Moon' comes on in five minutes!

Friezaess: I ain't even going to TOUCH that one! ^_~

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**THE END**


End file.
